Within an hour...

...we went from these tears to bliss and silliness.

Ah, the moods of a two-year old.

the better half of that same hour.....

You may be wondering what brought this awful tantrum on in the first place. I'll tell you: Miss Dana's cake. No lie. Miss Dana brought a piece of her cake over for Mommy, Daddy and Amiya to try. Amiya was very excited about cake as to her cake means birthday and birthday means singing and bouncing around. So, there was to be no waiting until after dinner to try a piece of this scrumptious cake.

Mommy had the audacity to think that a compromise could be met, but apparently, to a toddler, compromising on cake is like pulling out of Gaza. A very, very delicate matter to negotiate. Mommy suggested three bites now and more after dinner. Immediate, full-on hysterics. Nothing short of hysterics. There was nothing for Mommy to do. Absolutely no amount of talking, explaining, reasoning would make the tears stop. So, what's any Mommy do when confronted with a befuddling toddler tantrum? Tell me please, Mommies of Toddlers, because I don't know. In this case I pulled out the camera and after ten or so shots, she finally calmed down because I wasn't reacting like she wanted me to.

Now that she was only hyperventilating and not sobbing over me, I calmly said, "Three bites now, more after dinner. Take it or leave it" "Ok Mommy, tree bites now." I suspect more went in than three bites, but we'll quibble over quantity another day. But please, bear witness to the miracle that is Miss Dana's butter pecan cake. From screaming and frothing at the mouth to contemplative while tasting this baked good, this cake covers a range of emotions.

And a little warning: toddlers coming down off sugar highs from frosting and high-carb Indian dinners, should not be left loose with sticky foam letters.

Lessons Learned from Decorating a Cake

With Dana, a fabulous cook and Mom to Gabe, I've been taking a cake decorating class at our local Michael's store. The instructor leaves much (oh so much!) to be desired, but with a little practice and a lot of Crisco my skills are getting better and my arteries continue to harden. Thankfully, Florida weather is getting cooler and we're out walking at least a bit more than we have been since June.

The tri-flowered cake at right was my first cake. It was good. That's it though. The cake itself was a butter pecan cake and was truly delicious. The frosting was the Wilton buttercream. Ugh. But, I think I've learned a few tricks to make it less shortening-tasting and more buttercream tasting.

The grape cupcake was the best looking cupcake to come out of our third week of class. I used a box mix and made a cappucino/mocha layered cupcake. Way too much for a cupcake and contrary to what our instructor said, I think adding pudding to the mix does mess with the chemistry of the cupcake and cause it to rise more than it would without it. Nonetheless, I now can make a mean teddy bear head, pig, grapes and a ridiculous clown so full of fat and sugar that I will never feed it to a child. Ever.

Tonight was class #4, the last class and time for us to prove that we had mastered the Wilton rose. Ha ha ha ha ha. Most of us had roses that looked like cabbage. Which means that I will absolutely positively make that Martha Stewart garden cake one day since I've got the toughest veggie down cold. But, quite vainly, I will say that I was pleased with the final results. My rose petals with cracked, aphid-attacked edges actually looked good when assembled together and accessorized with leaves and frosting dots. It was a lemon cake torted with strawberry jam and lemon curd. Delicious, although next time a yellow cake with the same fillings would suffice.

But the most important thing I learned truly had little to do with cakes and a lot more to do with parenthood. The last few weeks around our house have been difficult. Amiya has not been feeling well physically and that's led to an emotional change in her daily ways. She's cranky, she's prone to crying and the tantrums are almost clockwork. And yet, the big picture, the cake if you will, is still beautiful. My cracked roses are like our cranky daughter. Just like my individual roses, her tantrums are hard to abide and not particularly pretty to gaze upon. But like my roses, when I put all of Amiya together, the individual moments lose some of their rough edges and I remember that I have the privilege of being a parent to an amazing child. And while I'm proud of my cake and I think it's quite nice for a novice, I'm more in love with my child, rough edges and all.

A Good Night For Vegetables

Ubnbelievably, Amiya ate a bowl of spinach last night. In an effort to consume more iron-rich foods, Mommy and Daddy are eating more spinach. Last night was the 80's favorite spinach salad with bits o' bacon (we used prosciutto) and a slightly tangy dressing. Daddy said we could make it again any time, Mommy even took extra spinach to finish up the rest and Amiya only somewhat grudgingly finished her bowl.

Three different ways of saying it was good. Three points for the 80's!

Stupid Sex Test #2

Dear Obie,

I'm still thinking pink! I'm 30 by this calendar and May was a nice month.

Love,
Mommy

Stupid Sex Test #1

Dear Obelix,

It looks like you're a girl.

http://www.childbirth.org/cgi-bin/boyorgirl.pl

But what if my belly always looks like a watermelon?

Love you,
Mommy

Letter to Obelix

Dear Obelix,

You are eighteen weeks today. Whoohoo! Thanks for the little kick this week - you can start those more often anytime you'd like.

We heard your little swish-thump of a heartbeat this Tuesday. Your big sister heard it too, although she probably thought the doctor was just making a rumbly tummy a lot louder.

I have a few things I'd like you to work on for me and really the first is the most important. You're such a creative little one, I can tell already but if you'd move back to some Chick Flick or G-rated movies, I'd like it. You're causing all these dreams that are making think you might be the next Arnold Schwarzenegger or Jean Claude Van Damme. In the past week you've had me dreaming all kinds of things and none of them are dreams I'd pay $7 to go see at the theater.

Aside from that, the heartburn is a bit much lately, but I'll deal. If it means you're already growing all that Gupta hair, it's ok. We get to see you again on October 19th and I wonder if there is going to be a little fuzzy halo just like there was for your sister. Your Daddy hated it, but I used to say that your sister was going to come out as a gorilla she was so hairy.

Are you a boy or a girl, Obie? I think boy, but that doesn't mean much. I really believed boy with your sister. Clearly I was wrong. I had a dream that you are a girl and that when you are/will be born you weigh 7 pounds 9 ounces. I also knew exactly your name, but I can't write that here and give away the goods. We're not going to find out if you're a boy or a girl, but I'm very, very curious. Your Daddy and I might do a little unscientific study and pee on some drain-o to see, but we'll keep the real surprise until the big day. Almost halfway there, Obie.

Love you already,
Mommy

She hears us, at least.

The question is, does it do any good?

We've got all these stupid little catch phrases:
- Do we get what we want when we cry?
- Do tantrums get you what you want?
- Next time listen to us, please.
- Are you going to listen from now on?

Now we hear them back. They are her very own, very regular way of mocking us, even though she doesn't know she's doing it.

Tonight, Daddy was laying on the floor, playing "pretend nap" with Amiya. Amiya didn't want to share Bear at all and made her feelings known. Daddy started to cry. What came out of this little (ahem) angel's mouth but the very popular, "Do we get what we want when we cry, Daddy? Is crying going to help?"

When she doesn't listen and we take a privilege or item away we automatically hear "I will listen for now on." Which is funny and cute only the first time because two seconds later it happens again and you know she's got the saying down pat but the meaning eludes her.

It's almost hard to be upset with her when she throws these back at us. It's just so damn cute. And the happy irony is that for all it frustrates us, she's going to say these things to the little ones that surround her one day and they'll throw them right back at her. Then we'll really have a laugh.

Ear Infection #81,924,004

It's been confirmed, our darling daughter has yet another ear infection. Sigh. Well, we knew she wasn't perfect and now we know exactly where she isn't perfect - her ears! So, we're on another round of anti-biotics which completely puts the kabosh on big girl underwear at naptime. Antibiotics do funny things to a kids system and in turn, awful things to the sheets.

She's taking it fairly well and hasn't complained of pain yet, but every single disagreement is a source of tears. For example, she'll ask for her new favorite snack: fruit snacks. If I say no, her little chin quivers and then all-out wailing commences. If she wants to run around naked in the pouring rain, I say no and a tantrum ensues. If she tells me Barney is yellow and I say no, that's BJ I am suddently candidate for Worst Mom of the Year 2005. All things in perspective, I guess, because two minutes later she's giving hugs and cuddles and telling me how she loves to snuggle.

Here is this morning's photo of our peanut, covered in her Elmo cereal that Grandma had the amazing foresight to send just when Amiya needed a hot breakfast cereal most. She loves it and doesn't even notice that she's not getting any milk with it!

Ice Cream Lollipops

Amiya is a happy, happy girl (aside from the obnoxious cold that just won't go away). She is growing up and now only wears a diaper during the night. That's right, dear Friends. Only at night. We've stopped wearing a diaper for naps now and she shows no signs of wanting to go back - arguing if we even suggest that she try a diaper. She's gone not one, two, three, or four naps now without an accident but five. That's right. Five.

It all started last Friday when she had an early lunch, a late nap, nothing to drink in-between the two and numerous trips to the toilet to empty her peanut-sized bladder. It seemed the odds were in her (and the washing machine's) favor, so I told her that if she could make it through her nap without peeing in her big girl underwear, we'd go get an ice cream.

Witness what happened:

That's right - her very first dilly bar. These are the things of my childhood - I remember riding to the DQ on the corner of Chicago Rd. and Drexel. (Maybe. Maybe I've got the streets wrong.) The chocolate that is so much wax it coats your mouth. The ice cream that isn't really cream. But, oh. Happiness on a hot summer day. Her enjoyment of her "ice cream lollipop" is just one more item to put in the she really is my daughter category.

Saturday her reward for making it through her nap was a trip to the pool. Sunday when I put her in she wanted to know what her reward was and I told her we'd have to wait and see. She never mentioned it again and has been dry since. What a girl!

(Disclaimer: this post may disappear in the event that I have jinxed myself and we suddenly revert back to earlier levels of diaper-wearing.)

Stumping Daddy

Vinay, scientist to his toes, has taken it upon himself to teach Amiya the three states of matter: liquid, solid, and gas. She knows that chocolate milk is a liquid, toast is a solid and the air around us is a gas. The initial conversation took place several weeks ago and now they'll randomly talk about these things during quiet moments, car rides, walks and the like. It's important to note that liquids (for clarity's sake) are things that go up and down.

Here's our car ride conversation from Saturday morning:

"Amiya, what's water?"

"A likid."

"Why is it a liquid?"

"Because it goes up and down."

"Is milk a liquid?"

"Yes, 'cuz it goes up and down."

"What is a spoon?"

"A solid."

"What else is a solid?"

"A bowl."

"What else is a liquid? What else goes up and down?"

"An airplane."

Daddy, astounded by the reasoning, doesn't quite know what to say.

Baby Monkey

This is her new favorite game. She calls it Baby Monkey. All it takes is one grown-up sitting on the ground and a giggling toddler named Amiya. Said toddler wraps her arms around a neck, gags the grown-up while hefting her (seems like so much more) 27 pound body up on the back and hangs on until gravity takes over and she slides to the ground. Rinse, lather, repeat. And repeat. And repeat.

But, we don't mind. What Baby Monkey doesn't know is that all the while she's being a monkey, we're getting hug after hug after hug. No complaints here.

Ahh.

We have finally broken down and decided that dial-up is not enough for us anymore. (More specifically not enough for me, but I'll share the blame with Vinay.) Next Friday we'll be getting much, much, much faster internet access which means that blogging will (I promise) be more consistent. This past week our service has been especially bad, making it almost impossible to upload pictures.

Anyway, what's she been up to? So much. And this was an intentionally slow week.

• We took Amiya for an ear check last week. Her left tube is officially out and lying in the inner ear waiting to roll on out. There was a slight bit of fluid behind the ear drum, so the doctor said we need to come back in a month to check it and to have a hearing test. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Crack me up. This child hears absolutely everything. Some of the recent things she's said include, "Mommy, are you tinkin' what I'm tinkin'?" and "You're drivin' my crazy! You're drivin' me nuts!" We have no idea where she got the former. I plead guilty to saying the latter, but it's never in a mean manner - just when she's tickling me or playing silly games.
• Amiya talks constantly about the baby in my you-ta-rus. She seems to be getting that the baby will come out and live with us and as much as she can possibly comprehend that she'll have to share, she seems ok with it. But, Bear is a non-negotiable issue. Bear is not for sharing. When we ask Amiya where she will sleep, she says in her new big girl bed. When we ask where the baby will sleep, she says in the crib. If we ask why they can't both sleep in the crib it's not because Amiya is several times bigger or because the baby will cry and wake Amiya up, but rather because the baby will apparantly be born with a fervent envy of Bear and try to steal him away from Amiya. But not to worry, Amiya tells us that the baby already has a bear in my you-ta-rus. I just want to know how it got there.
• Amiya's had a bit of a cold these past few weeks. Nothing too serious, but still enough to be a cold. Therefore, she's been under strict orders to not visit the pool. This is making both of us a bit nuts as she wants to swim everyday and she constantly asks me if it's ok to go swimming now. But, I suspect it's less about swimming and more about this:

You see, her good friend Gabe is usually at the pool, too. Swimming comes second to hanging out with her buddy. I tell Gabe's Mom that one will go to college on the west coast and one on the east coast. No trusting these two when they're older.

What's going on???

We haven't been posting lately and we're asking for a thousand apologies. We've been very, very busy with a Hurricane Katrina relief drive in our community and so all of our time has been going towards that until last night. But, things should be back to normal for us now. Sadly, five days of work exhausted Amiya and I, I can't even begin to imagine the despair of those who don't have a house and a warm meal to come home to.

Some of our efforts included going door to door in our neighborhoods with the kids and that meant explaining to Amiya exactly what Hurricane Katrina had done. She knows that the storm took away the families houses, their clothes, their food and their medicine. She also knows that the children don't have any toys. As we went door to door, she made impassioned pleas to the homeowners stating, "But the shildren have no clothes." or "But the shildren need mecin. (medecine)" Yesterday as we worked with many other Moms and kids in our neighborhood to box up all of the supplies we collected, she helped and talked nonstop about what the children would be getting. On our way home from a doctor's appointment later in the afternoon, she was listing for me everything we had packed. "Clothes. Mecin. Food. Ketchup. Shampoo. Diapers." The list went on and on and then she got very, very quiet. All of the sudden in a very, very sad voice, she said, "Mommy, the shildren don't have any cheesecake!" And now we know Amiya's priorities. Food, clothes, roof over the head, hugs and kisses and cheesecake.

In other news, Amiya has a new favorite game: pretending to be Clifford. She puts on her Clifford ears that her cousins Ravi and Nisha sent, gets down on all fours and barks her way around the living room. It's all well and good until she starts licking her plate at the dinner table. Now, if only she'd clean up all the crumbs on the floor - it'd be almost as if we had a real dog. (Bad Christy, bad, bad Christy.)

And finally, it appears that the tube in Amiya's left ear has worked its' way almost out. There is a bit of fluid behind the eardrum now, so we have to go back in a month and see if it's still there. If it is, a new tube will have to be inserted. Argh! Come on already - just sign us up to put the tube back in. What this means if you're not familiar with tubes is either that fluid is going to disappear (unlikely) or continue to amass and cause yet another painful ear infection. Give us the tube!!!

That's all for now, but more soon. We promise!

Quiet Time

We've started something new around here the past few weeks. (We say that a lot, don't we?) And it has been working something fierce for us! Before Amiya's afternoon nap, she spends the length of one calm, quiet CD in her room for "Quiet Time." In the beginning Quiet Time was anything but. It was Amiya teaching Bear to swim - "Legs todeller, Bear!" and books being pulled off the bookshelf as fast as two tiny hands could manage. But the past few days, it's been just shy of magical. When I peek around the corner into her room, it's to find her sitting in the big rocking chair, leafing through a book and narrating the story. This not only calms her down for her nap, it makes her entertain herself which is not her strongest skill. But the best thing is that it's just cute to see her dwarfed by the huge rocker using her feet to hold up the book.